Tuesday, July 19, 2005
The discipline of forgiveness
This snippet from Henri Nouwen's The Return of the Prodigal Son serves as a poignant reminder and encapsulation of what the Lord has been saying to me the whole of this week past. I find the words full of vulnerability, encouraging in its weakness, but it is still a challenge to let go of the flesh that seeks to "demand its rights be avenged". A fuller realization of what God means when He asks us in His Word to crucify the flesh and deny oneself is emerging.The Discipline of Forgiveness
I have often said 'I forgive you', but even as I said these words my heart remained angry or resentful. I still wanted to hear the story that tells me that I was right after all; I still wanted to hear apologies and excusesl I still wanted the satisfaction of receiving some praise in return - if only the praise for being so forgiving!
But God's forgiveness is unconditional; it comes from a heart that does not demand anything for itself, a heart that is completely empty of self-seeking. It is this divine forgiveness that I have to practise in my daily life. It calls me to keep stepping over all my arguments that say forgiveness is unwise, unhealthy and impractical. It challenges me to step over all my needs for gratitude and compliments. Finally, it demands of me that I step over that wounded part of my heart that feels hurt and wronged and that wants to stay in control and put a few conditions between me and the one whom I am asked to forgive.
This 'stepping over' is the authentic discipline of forgiveness.
Excerpt from 'The Dance of Life' by Henri Nouwen.
Sometimes, there is no need for sentimentality ("he/she has been such a dear friend"), no requirement to justify ("they didn't know any better") and no psychological self-manipulations ("God loves them too") -- it is sufficient just make a resolute decision to 'step over and step forward', also well pictured in a parable put forth by a friend called Sand and Stone.
Labels: Forgiveness
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