Tuesday, October 03, 2006
My Prison Experience
I went to jail last Sunday. Instead of walking away in despair, I captured afresh a real and certain hope in the gospel of Jesus Christ that we often take for granted. It raised in me a few questions:- How deep can God's mercy extend to people who have sinned, even to the vilest of criminals?
- How much can the grace of God absorb when we think we have blown it and there is no way back from our mistakes?
- How can we see past the darkness of the "daily prison cells" that sometimes chracterizes our lives?
Phil, a brother in Christ, asked me a couple of weeks ago if I would mind accompanying him to visit an inmate named Donald. It was Phil's second visit since the last one three months ago together with a pastor. During the last visit, Donald shared that he still carried the guilt and remorse of the murder he committed in his twenties after 15 years in prison. With that, Phil and the pastor extended an invitation to Donald into a personal relationship with the Lord Jesus Christ.
Now, after a few months since that visit, Donald has found God - Jesus Christ has forgiven him and the priceless hope for change stands ahead of him. His past no longer haunts him and guilt no longer has its grip on his conscience. I liked Donald - he was candid and open. He was not very educated at the time he was jailed. Now, after many years, he says that he realises that he was "not as limited intellectually" as he thought he was when he was young. I personally thought that he was a very intelligent and streetwise person. At times, he would talk about his prison life. Other instances, he would share with us how sometimes, he felt lonely without anyone to share his thoughts with as English as not his first language - but he felt that he could open his heart to us. He would also bring up things about his wife and two kids, and his elder brother and his family - how he wanted to help them now and when he finishes his prison sentence in three years time.
Seeing Donald share his hopes and dreams - sometimes with a tinge of regret, other times with a tiny sparkle in his eyes. One wonders, compared to other people who are physically free outside but are trapped by the ugly claws of sin, and those who are slaves to relationships and things -- who are the ones that are really imprisoned? Donald has been stripped of all the normal privilleges we all take for granted. But the one portion that he's now found, will be something that I believe will set him on the road to freedom. I can sense it both in my spirit, as well as in his.
My prayer for him would be that he will cry out to the Lord as David did in his times of trouble and loneliness:Psalm 142:4-7
Look to my right and see; no one is concerned for me. I have no refuge; no one cares for my life. I cry to you, O Lord; I say, "You are my refuge, my portion in the land of the living." Listen to my cry, for I am in desperate need; rescue me from those who pursue me, for they are too strong for me. Set me free from my prison, that I may praise your name. Then the righteous will gather about me because of your goodness to me.
Donald was touched by our visit and care. This was my first time visiting Donald, but I walked away from this visit sensing the Father's hand upon his life. God has found another prodigal son, and the Father has runned to embrace him even though the son may see himself as far away from home. Real hope and freedom are such rare commodities in a world that is often driven by greed, unrest and strive. But Donald has now found an authentic hope and I pray that he will find other believers that will come along side of him in his newfound journey. I also felt a burden to want to come back to visit this brother again. Maybe these are aspects of David's prayer in Psalm 142:7 - "Set me free from my prison, that I may praise your name. Then the righteous will gather about me because of your goodness to me."
All in all, as I mentioned at the beginning, this was an unexpected encounter - I started thinking that I had nothing whatsoever in common with Donald. But after this visit, I realise that I have more in common with him that I initially assumed. Fallen sons redeemed by a merciful God - there is no darkness so deep that His love cannot reach. The Father has started His redemptive work to free us from our prisons of shame, hurt and bondage, and He will complete it if we let Him. Donald's testimony and seeing what God is doing through his life gives me another vantage point where I am reminded of this fact. We all could do well to remember this when we are engulfed in the daily hardships of 'prison life'.
Labels: Christian Living, Encouragement, God's Love
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